The number one reason relationships end is jealousy. Our aim is to figure out how to stop jealousy in a relationship before it causes destruction.
Jealousy is a pretty tricky emotion. It most often comes from insecurity, impossible expectations, as well as social pressure. And sometimes it is not easy to control or ignore.
But no need to worry.
On the bright side: you can work through it. It’s a step to building self-love.
In this blog, I will help you overcome jealousy so we can create healthier relationships and boost self-esteem.
Hold on tight—I’m about to open the door.
1. Identify your insecurity
Knowing the cause of your insecurity is the first step towards overcoming jealousy.
Take time for reflection on yourself. Why do you feel jealous, how to stop jealousy in a relationship and what actually triggered it? Is it a past experience, a fear, or maybe something else?
Sometimes our past experience interferes into today’s feelings. Maybe you have experienced a scenario where you felt betrayed.
You can identify the cause of jealousy and start building a more secure, trusting relationship by addressing it at its source.
For instance, suppose you begin to feel jealous when your partner spends time with his female friend.
Instead of acting impulsively, you start to realize why you feel jealous. It may be due to your insecurity, even due to communication gaps.
You might discover via reflection that what you are projecting as jealousy is actually a deep-seated fear of abandonment due to past relationships.
Thus, you have to identify this as an underlying problem and communicate freely with your partner to solve it.
2. Be truthful in your relationship
Honesty is the best policy, isn’t it? You must’ve heard this million times and guess what? That’s absolutely true.
Being honest with your partner means you are building a solid foundation for your relationship.
Everything gets stronger and reliable when you stop repressing those feelings of jealousy with your partner also.
Share those emotions.
Imagine your relationship like bridge. The more you share your feelings with your partner, the stronger it will become.
Be there at the right time with the right words.
You should use “I” statements to express how you feel, as well as listen actively whenever your partner speaks too much.
3. Open communication
Communication is key, especially when addressing how to stop jealousy in relationship.
Each time you feel jealous, inform your partner, and yet more importantly, make sure you listen to their side of the story, as well.
Be a team and find solutions that will both make you feel safe and secure.
Communication is the love language in a relationship. It’s how you think, feel, and dream together.
Completely share with your partner which behaviors or situations you are jealous about.
Be honest and specific to describe to your spouse how you feel.
For example, instead of saying to your partner, “You become jealous any time you are interacting with others,” you could say this: “Every time I see you as talking to others, I feel bad about myself, which brings in the jealousy.”
Is there some way we can work out how to stop jealousy in relationship?
4. Build trust together
Trust” forms the base of a healthy relationship. Act in ways that strengthen trust, like keeping promises and being reliable.
Trust grows when both partners actively contribute to it.
Promises are like the glue that fixes the bridge of trust. Even for a really big promise, no matter how small it is, you try to keep it.
No issue, we all do mistakes after all we’re human. If you mess up, apologize sincerely.
On the flip side, if your partner apologizes, be ready to forgive. Forgiveness is the magic potion that heals and strengthens trust.
5. Focus on personal growth
Turn the spotlight inward and focus on your personal growth.
Set small and big goals and celebrate the victories along the way. Do what make your heart sing? Whether it’s painting, dancing, or coding, pursue your passions.
Jealousy often sneaks in when insecurities take center stage.
But guess what?
When you’re focused on personal growth, confidence becomes your shield.
When you’re the best version of yourself, your relationship benefits too. You bring positivity and vibrancy to the partnership.
So, nurture your personal growth and watch as it becomes a key strategy in learning how to stop jealousy in a relationship.
6. Support your partner’s growth
As much as you focus on yourself, let him start and grow with you. Celebrate his milestones and cheer loudly for him.
A good partnership relies heavily on mutual support.
For instance, your partner delivers some goal they had been working towards. If it is a promotion, a project delivery, or anything personal. Celebrate them like you just won the lottery.
It is not clapping when they win; it is standing with them when they are facing issues.
Most of all, when you are both for each other people’s dreams, jealousy takes a seat at the back.
7. Celebrate achievements together
Instead of letting jealousy creep in, celebrate each other’s victories. When your partner succeeds, share in their joy.
Remember, you’re a team, and together you can conquer anything.
Not every achievement has to be a grand trophy moment. Celebrate the small wins too.
For instance, if your partner get promotion, you could celebrate the achievement by preparing a delicious meal for them.
8. Practice gratitude in your relationship
Reflect on the positive things about your relationship. What are you smiling about? What warms up your heart? Let those thoughts fill your mind.
Gratitude could be used to shift your focus away from jealousy and channel it toward something appreciative.
How to Practice Gratitude:
Create a gratitude journal: Write down the things you are grateful for daily.
Say oral appreciations: Let your partner know what you love about him or her.
Surprise gratitude notes: Leave little notes of appreciation where your partner can find them.
Create a ritual of gratitude: Let it come from your routine, whether daily or weekly.
Gratitude does not happen overnight. It is a habit. The more you do it, the more it will tend to spread over your relationship.
Just keep on doing it.
9. Keep healthy boundaries
Boundaries are not restrictions; instead, they provide room for safety and helps you in understanding each other better.
Healthy boundaries create trust and diminish jealousy.
Respect boundaries of your partner and says, “I care about your feelings and want to be safe with you.”
How can you set healthy boundaries?
1. Communicate openly: Share your thoughts on what makes you comfortable and uncomfortable.
2. Be respectful: Treat other people’s boundaries in a way that you want yours to be treated also.
3. Accept change: Boundaries changes with time; hence, be flexible in your relationship with changing times.
10. Prioritize quality time
In the middle of all the chaos that life throws at you, create quality time together.
It could be a date night on a weekly basis or a lazy Sunday morning brunch.
When you spend quality time, it deepens your connection and love in your relationship.
Be there for them whenever they need you. Put away your cell phones, turn off the tube, and connect with one another.
Lastly, do not forget to love and appreciate each other.
A simple “I love you” or a sweet compliment would be really appreciated that might make your quality time even more special.
Conclusion
Sometimes it is normal to be a little jealous, but by solving such issues together you can even make your relationship stronger.
- First, you try to determine why you are jealous. What makes you insecure? Once the source of the problem is identified, you can work on it.
- Be open to your partner about feelings. Talk about how to stop the feeling of jealousy. Share your feelings with a clear sense of not accusing.
- Building trust does not happen overnight. However, it is worth much. One step through repeated action builds trust.
- Strive for self-improvement.
- Support your better half. Celebrate their successes and achievements as well. Do the teamwork.
- Count your blessings. Think of the good things in your relationship.
- Be grateful. Gratitude shifts your mindset and helps you look at what you have instead of at what’s missing.
- Set healthy boundaries. Draw a line and know when to do so to make both of you comfortable and respected in the relationship.
- Spend quality time together for improving your relationship.
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